Wow, what a number! 666! Most people in Estonia were celebrating Midsummer´s Eve, which is the hugest summer holiday. I think it could be even bigger than Christmas. I wasn´t. Instead, I stayed at home and watched TV. Loads and loads of Grey´s Anatomy. How boring can you be, eh? As my plans include going to South-Estonia for a relay race (not exactly a race though, because nobody wins) on the 28th, I didn´t feel like driving all the way there in the 22nd. Besides, there was a cutting board to be won (see previous post)! For some people, driving 3 hours might not seem so awful, but it really is with that car. No AC. Besides, sometimes it is great to be alone. Was it great then? Considering how I became a bit depressed, maybe not…
The day started fine. I drove to Nõmme to run on better (softer) trails. It was quite hot, which is odd for June 23. Usually, that day is always rainy and cold, even if all the previous and next days are super warm. As if mocking me, this year the day decided to be a nice one. Of course, this made staying at home much worse. I was in the city after all. The run had been exhausting and thus I didn´t even want to drive as near as 75 km. About an hour away, my family (sister, aunt, cousins) were celebrating the night. Bonfire, sauna, barbecue. What was wrong with me that I didn´t go? Why did I choose solitude? Let´s say that I was asleep in the afternoon, too tired from the workout. I remember snoozing on the bed. I remember hearing Mjauki´s breathing from underneath the bed.
The odd thing, however, is that I both enjoy and hate being alone. I was quite depressed because no one had thought to invite me anywhere. The invitation to go to the cottage only came after I had asked what they were up to… On the other hand, sometimes I actually enjoy being alone and staying at home. I might be thrilled when someone invites me somewhere but if it doesn´t happen right away, the enthusiasm slowly dies. I might even start to dread that particular event or meeting. The idea of something could be better than the thing itself. Sadly enough, the real thing could fail to fulfill my expectations. Maybe it´s my mindset that is wrong. Maybe I should appreciate life a bit more and be thankful for small successes as well.
Own and live in a house.
A quiet day at home. However, one reason I stayed indoors was that I wanted to work on a new web app that we will soon add to our small company´s website. Learning bits and pieces of web development certainly is useful for my future.
Write AND publish a book.
Oh noes. I did have a nightmarish dream I thought I could use for the Kindle book contest but it did not seem so inspiring in broad daylight.
Win a major race.
A long-ish run. 16 km in the forest. Hot like in hell. Not so good.